Tuesday, September 15, 2009

5-Iron, Not Just For Mid Range Approach Shots Anymore

I am convinced that nature hates my wife. Since we’ve been together, I have had more than my fair share of strange encounters with wildlife, including being attacked by monkeys and wild dogs in Bali. So when it came to removing the giant wasp nest under the soffit, I had a great deal of trepidation. It was in early-March, just after we took possession of the house that I decided there was no better time than now to take down the 1 foot in diameter nest hanging from one of our front soffits. From all the reading I had done on the internet, late winter would mean that most of the wasps would either be dead or sleeping.

So from my third floor window, I took my trusty 5-iron and gave the giant mass of paper a good hard poke, exposing the inside of the nest to the cold air. As soon as I exposed a gash, I quickly retreated back inside my window, expecting a cloud of pissed off yellow jackets to come looking for retribution. Fortunately the internet proved to be a reliable source of information, because the nest was pretty much empty. I waited 20 minutes before going back out the window to finish off the nest. After scraping off the last bits of paper, I went downstairs to inspect the nest rubble. There were about 5 groggy yellow jackets still inside, left to the cold winter air, they would soon expire. This round: Husband 1 - Nature 0.

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